I feel so friggin good it's not even funny. I feel happy and totally sure of myself and that's all I ever wanted. I can't wait for people to wake up and decide to treat me like I'm a human being and not some dormat. I have to let some go, some were important and still are, some mean nothing to me, but I have to let them go. And I love the feeling.
Oh, and I never needed you. It was the other way around, so in the near future when a friend as good as me comes along maybe you'll learn how to treat them better, but I'm gonnnnneeeee =]
Congrats to the lady cavs and hope for winning their first games today.
Did I mention I'm losing weight, or shall I say lost. A whole bunch, I'm a workout freak now and yea I look and feel awesome. But I always been cute ;)
About Me
- Gianelle
- Out of the trillions of numbers that's in the world. Leave me a few. That lead to you x3
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Monday, November 30, 2009
California...
Tomorrow is my last day in California. As much as I miss SOME of my TRUE friends and I can't miss anymore days out of school, I don't think I'm ready to go back. I like it here, it's relaxing and everyone here is just so welcoming and nice. I liked being away from the one thing that messes up my train of thought. Well, I should be good to go. This trip gave me a lot to think about and turns out I'm okay. I will be just fine and no one can mess that up. I'm too much of a good person to get any less then I deserve, so HA.
Here are some pics<3
Here are some pics<3
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
11/21-22... 23 and forever.
I was yours momentarily but now all you do is bring me agony, so much agony and this bitch comes and takes my victory.
I call her defeat, she's always right there...
I call her defeat, she's always right there...
It's a little complicated.
I don't want you, I need you but I can't have you. I can have you but I just don't want to go there, I just don't want to take things that far.
I don't no if things will ever be fixed, if things were ever fixed, if things were ever broken. This has being going on so long, I should be used to it, but it's consuming me and I want you out.
But I need you<3
I don't no if things will ever be fixed, if things were ever fixed, if things were ever broken. This has being going on so long, I should be used to it, but it's consuming me and I want you out.
But I need you<3
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Bruva from another Mutha
Now when I need Beezy is when his ass wants to be in California, like calling him and staying on the phone for hours isn't running up my bill. Damn I miss that black kid<3
Anyway, things have been great. I am officially on the District Wide Student Government along with my dear Jenelia, kicking ass as usual. I'm transferring from music to drawing, I'll do a lot better there since I'm always drawing. I found this really awesome college that caught my attention, but I'm going to keep my options open. I haven't had one of "Those days" in a while, so I've been doing well. Except that I have the flu, not THEE flu but the flu. This is my second day out of school but I'll be good by tomorrow. I'll be super mad if I can't make it to my retreat on friday, I'm really excited for that.
Well, bye
Anyway, things have been great. I am officially on the District Wide Student Government along with my dear Jenelia, kicking ass as usual. I'm transferring from music to drawing, I'll do a lot better there since I'm always drawing. I found this really awesome college that caught my attention, but I'm going to keep my options open. I haven't had one of "Those days" in a while, so I've been doing well. Except that I have the flu, not THEE flu but the flu. This is my second day out of school but I'll be good by tomorrow. I'll be super mad if I can't make it to my retreat on friday, I'm really excited for that.
Well, bye
Sunday, October 4, 2009
Sending this one all the way to Cali.
My heart just can't seem to make up it's mind. I love you but I want to hate you. I need you but I also need you gone. My heart is telling me not to make any hasty decisions that I might regret, but maybe that is what I need. Maybe I need to eliminate what is getting in my way of living how I want to. I know what is best for me and then I don't. I just need to focus on me, on what makes me happy and who makes me happy. Maybe I need to discover some new interest to make up for what's missing. Maybe I don't want to hate you after all, maybe I don't need you gone, maybe I just need you to be consistent with your actions, because your words don't count for anything.
Maybe you think you know who I may or may not be talking about. Maybe I'm speaking about myself and maybe just maybe if you feel that this has anything to do with you, you will find it in your heart to let me live.
P.S-I'm in the process of erasing those thoughts that I try to tuck in the back of my head and replacing them with better ones. Likkkkkkke, I cut my hair, school is going great, started playing the sax, joined some clubs, and maybe meeting new people is not sooo bad.
Maybe you think you know who I may or may not be talking about. Maybe I'm speaking about myself and maybe just maybe if you feel that this has anything to do with you, you will find it in your heart to let me live.
P.S-I'm in the process of erasing those thoughts that I try to tuck in the back of my head and replacing them with better ones. Likkkkkkke, I cut my hair, school is going great, started playing the sax, joined some clubs, and maybe meeting new people is not sooo bad.
Monday, September 28, 2009
All on the same wave ;)
I love my friends. Every last one of them contribute so much to my life.
I need Jenelia, she has no idea how much I need her. I'm so dependent on her to tell me when I'm right and wrong, to reassure me that everything is going to be okay, to tell me she needs me as much as I need her because I could not see us apart.
Despite the fact that things have been a little rocky and we are just starting to get back on track, I never lost my love for Diana. She does things, or has done things that I don't like. But something about her overpowers her flaws and I love her regaurdless<3
Roman is a complete pain in the ass. We argue every five minutes. Most of the time he starts it and sometimes I do. But at the end of the day I'll text him or he'll text me to say I Love You.
And last but not least, Daddy SD^. I don't know how to even explain our friendship. It started with one phone call that lasted four hours and after that we were just inseperable. Sebastian, I love you too much to explain in words. All I can say is that like I have always been, I'm by your side through anything. And trust me, that anything has occured one too many times.
Oh and to Ryan and Stephanie, there is not one day that I don't think about the both of you and don't start laughing my ass off<3
I need Jenelia, she has no idea how much I need her. I'm so dependent on her to tell me when I'm right and wrong, to reassure me that everything is going to be okay, to tell me she needs me as much as I need her because I could not see us apart.
Despite the fact that things have been a little rocky and we are just starting to get back on track, I never lost my love for Diana. She does things, or has done things that I don't like. But something about her overpowers her flaws and I love her regaurdless<3
Roman is a complete pain in the ass. We argue every five minutes. Most of the time he starts it and sometimes I do. But at the end of the day I'll text him or he'll text me to say I Love You.
And last but not least, Daddy SD^. I don't know how to even explain our friendship. It started with one phone call that lasted four hours and after that we were just inseperable. Sebastian, I love you too much to explain in words. All I can say is that like I have always been, I'm by your side through anything. And trust me, that anything has occured one too many times.
Oh and to Ryan and Stephanie, there is not one day that I don't think about the both of you and don't start laughing my ass off<3
Saturday, September 19, 2009
Pouring out of me
I have to live with the fact that I may never know why or how. The What If's occur now and then and I have to push them out of my mind. What If. What If. What If. Then there is the Why and why, why, why? Playing over and it never gets tired. How? How can I think this way, never allowing my self to go a day with out thinking of you, your lies, whether they were intentional or not and our friendship, and my doubts, my pain, my hows, my whys, and my what ifs.
Let go before your lows consume your highs. I'm trying, I need time. But I'll forget like how I forgave, slowly but surely.
9/22/09
I know I posted this blog earlier this week, but I would like to add on to it.
I don't enjoy thinking this way. I hate it actually, this part of me that can't seem to let go. To get over what is already done. And to add on to it, I make things a lot worse in my mind. This doesn't make sense, not one bit to anyone other then myself. But this is my blog right? So, I can write what ever I feel like, even if you don't understand. It's like something is missing. A huge piece. I tried to figure out what it is but it's got the best of me. It's like I'm thinking back to every moment in my life and I realize how my best has never been enough for anyone. They always want more until I'm sucked dry with nothing left for my self. Get it? It's not you, or her, or him, or the person behind you. It's me, but I'm contridicting myself, I do it all the time. And I can't seem to fulfill my own expectations and standards, you can forget about anyone else's.
Let go before your lows consume your highs. I'm trying, I need time. But I'll forget like how I forgave, slowly but surely.
9/22/09
I know I posted this blog earlier this week, but I would like to add on to it.
I don't enjoy thinking this way. I hate it actually, this part of me that can't seem to let go. To get over what is already done. And to add on to it, I make things a lot worse in my mind. This doesn't make sense, not one bit to anyone other then myself. But this is my blog right? So, I can write what ever I feel like, even if you don't understand. It's like something is missing. A huge piece. I tried to figure out what it is but it's got the best of me. It's like I'm thinking back to every moment in my life and I realize how my best has never been enough for anyone. They always want more until I'm sucked dry with nothing left for my self. Get it? It's not you, or her, or him, or the person behind you. It's me, but I'm contridicting myself, I do it all the time. And I can't seem to fulfill my own expectations and standards, you can forget about anyone else's.
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Mind Block
Things that I used to find entertaining no longer amuse me. I feel like I'm grower up much faster then I planned to. Social me is no longer outgoing, a lot nicer, but quiet. I don't like quiet. I want things to be just right this year, good grades, zero stress, and more good grades. I'm trying to make things perfect by minimizing my social life. I'm sucking the life out of myself, out of everything. I haven't even laughed so hard that I cried in awhile. I need sometime away from myself.
Anyway, I notcied something today. Well, I've always known this but today it really hit me. I realized how beautiful my mother's laugh is. I know that sounds weird but after I hear it once, I kind of crave for more. It's those straight from the gut kind of laughs, the one that makes you want to laugh. Her smile is awesome too, a full on smile. All teeth, and eyes so squinty that you can't tell if they are open, like mine. It's nice to see my mother smile, to hear her laugh. She deserves the world, to be happy if only for that one second. It's not enough though, I know that. With all the she has endured, she still manages to be the best mother I know, even if I don't appreciate it at that exact moment.
And to whom it may concern,
You are beautiful, smart, and the sweetest person I have ever met. Everything about you seems so sincere, don't let anyone steal that from you. No matter how much you may think that person means to you. I can see you regaining the color back in your face, your smile actually seems real. It kills me to see you suffer but you have to take control of your life. Your heart isn't telling you that you are happy, your brain is trying to convince it that it is. You're hurting, it's written all over your face and I'm not even in the position to tell you. But I don't know how much longer you can take of this abuse and I don't know how much longer I can take of watching you die slowly. I hope that this is enough but who am I kidding, I know it's not. I just hope that you realize that you deserve someone who adores you.
Goodnight.
Anyway, I notcied something today. Well, I've always known this but today it really hit me. I realized how beautiful my mother's laugh is. I know that sounds weird but after I hear it once, I kind of crave for more. It's those straight from the gut kind of laughs, the one that makes you want to laugh. Her smile is awesome too, a full on smile. All teeth, and eyes so squinty that you can't tell if they are open, like mine. It's nice to see my mother smile, to hear her laugh. She deserves the world, to be happy if only for that one second. It's not enough though, I know that. With all the she has endured, she still manages to be the best mother I know, even if I don't appreciate it at that exact moment.
And to whom it may concern,
You are beautiful, smart, and the sweetest person I have ever met. Everything about you seems so sincere, don't let anyone steal that from you. No matter how much you may think that person means to you. I can see you regaining the color back in your face, your smile actually seems real. It kills me to see you suffer but you have to take control of your life. Your heart isn't telling you that you are happy, your brain is trying to convince it that it is. You're hurting, it's written all over your face and I'm not even in the position to tell you. But I don't know how much longer you can take of this abuse and I don't know how much longer I can take of watching you die slowly. I hope that this is enough but who am I kidding, I know it's not. I just hope that you realize that you deserve someone who adores you.
Goodnight.
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
Buzz kill
It really, truely saddens me when I see beautiful, smart, young women play themselves with shitty low lives. Everyone has this interpretation that all men are full of bullshit, when in fact these little girls are the one to blame for their own misery. You put yourself through hell trying to compete with his everyday life. If he was that "into you", he would make it clear from the start that you are his first priority. Don't expect him to drop his whole life in a second because you're so insecure that you need his undivided attention at all times. The whole clingy act is starting to get real old and I can't put this in nicer words because it should be clear to you. You deserve much better then what you are recieving but it's up to you to make that change. I'm sick and tired of hearing girls talking about how their boyfriends are complete assholes but they know that they'll change some day. That's bullshit and you know it. How can you stand being mistreated when all you have done was shown him that you care. It has to be consistent, if he says he loves you one day and the next he's talking to you like you aren't important, cheating, lying, then it's not real. It's obvious that you do not share mutual feelings, and if your feelings aren't important to him then why are you sacrificing your own to keep him satisfied?
Is it really worth it?
Is it really worth it?
Monday, September 7, 2009
Sunday, September 6, 2009
GUCCI
This weekend could not have gone any better.
We went to Canobie Lake Park (me, Jenelia, Ms.Gwen-Jenelia's Momma, Diana, and Nicio)
It was AWESOME! I never laughed so damn hard and screamed so much in my life.
I rode my first rollercoaster ride ='D I kept yelling GUCCI! the whole ride and Diana was throwing up that WP^ Lmaoo. We was straight chillinggggg ;)
We got back in Prov around 11 and slept over Jenelia's house. I was being od corny yesterday. Everything that was coming out my mouth was dry as hell, but it's all hood, gucci.
Anyway, I just got home from having lunch with Jenelia, her mom, Nicio, and Didi. We went to this Mexican resturaunt in Manton called Chilangos. I recommend their chips and dip 'cause we beasted on them lmao.
We took some pictures but Jenelia has them in her phone, so I'll wait 'til she sends them to me and I'll post them up.
Watch this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tCMjJqVBm2g
We went to Canobie Lake Park (me, Jenelia, Ms.Gwen-Jenelia's Momma, Diana, and Nicio)
It was AWESOME! I never laughed so damn hard and screamed so much in my life.
I rode my first rollercoaster ride ='D I kept yelling GUCCI! the whole ride and Diana was throwing up that WP^ Lmaoo. We was straight chillinggggg ;)
We got back in Prov around 11 and slept over Jenelia's house. I was being od corny yesterday. Everything that was coming out my mouth was dry as hell, but it's all hood, gucci.
Anyway, I just got home from having lunch with Jenelia, her mom, Nicio, and Didi. We went to this Mexican resturaunt in Manton called Chilangos. I recommend their chips and dip 'cause we beasted on them lmao.
We took some pictures but Jenelia has them in her phone, so I'll wait 'til she sends them to me and I'll post them up.
Watch this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tCMjJqVBm2g
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Running Water
Yesterday was an interesting day.
Roman picked me and Sebastian up and we went shopping at emerald square mall.
We had fun looking around and buying shit we don't need. Well, stuff I didn't need. Like a 55$ bookbag, but it was cute. I convinced Sebastian into buying this really awesome button up shirt and this nice grey jacket, I was so proud, he looked so handsome =']
We went into spencer's gifts and played with whips, lmaoo. Sounds dirty, I know ;)
I whipped Sebastian on his forearm and he's all scratched up.
Now he can go around telling people that I'm his Daddy :)
After the mall we went to a million of other places, including the beach. We sat on the rocks and just hung out like 'old times'.
Today on the other hand was horrible. I felt so out my element in my own school. All the communities are all mixed up and I barely get to see my old leadership friends. I hated it. I didn't talk to anyone, Sebastian didn't even show up to gym to save me from my misery. Asshole. I sat alone at lunch, I sat alone in class, and I couldn't wait 'til the day was over.
After school I treated my cousin Danny to some Antonio's pizza, went to pias/hlth&sci to pick up Jenelia and my sister. We walked Preggie (Genesis) to Tiffany's house and went back to Jenelia's to laugh our asses off.
I try not to bum myself out but it's kind of hard not to when you just want to lock yourself in a room and sulk all day. I don't have Roman to look forward to everyday anymore and I never realized how much I would miss him 'til now. I feel like I have to start all over again and build relationships with people that I don't want anything to do with, and I'm usually a people person. Sort of. I want to get a job because I miss the feeling of making my own money and the responsibility. I don't know man. Today was an early release day, meaning I still haven't had all my classes. Maybe it won't suck as much as it did today. Hopefully. And now I'm constantly thinking about stuff (someone) that I just want to shake out of my head. I can't believe I'm already stressing my self out. W/E I'm going to fill out some job apps and go to bed.
Oh, Jenelia, Karl, and I all gave eachother 'Native American' names.
Goodnight. oh, and good luck tomorrow, Marchanthony. My awesome little football player booger is playing =]
Roman picked me and Sebastian up and we went shopping at emerald square mall.
We had fun looking around and buying shit we don't need. Well, stuff I didn't need. Like a 55$ bookbag, but it was cute. I convinced Sebastian into buying this really awesome button up shirt and this nice grey jacket, I was so proud, he looked so handsome =']
We went into spencer's gifts and played with whips, lmaoo. Sounds dirty, I know ;)
I whipped Sebastian on his forearm and he's all scratched up.
Now he can go around telling people that I'm his Daddy :)
After the mall we went to a million of other places, including the beach. We sat on the rocks and just hung out like 'old times'.
Today on the other hand was horrible. I felt so out my element in my own school. All the communities are all mixed up and I barely get to see my old leadership friends. I hated it. I didn't talk to anyone, Sebastian didn't even show up to gym to save me from my misery. Asshole. I sat alone at lunch, I sat alone in class, and I couldn't wait 'til the day was over.
After school I treated my cousin Danny to some Antonio's pizza, went to pias/hlth&sci to pick up Jenelia and my sister. We walked Preggie (Genesis) to Tiffany's house and went back to Jenelia's to laugh our asses off.
I try not to bum myself out but it's kind of hard not to when you just want to lock yourself in a room and sulk all day. I don't have Roman to look forward to everyday anymore and I never realized how much I would miss him 'til now. I feel like I have to start all over again and build relationships with people that I don't want anything to do with, and I'm usually a people person. Sort of. I want to get a job because I miss the feeling of making my own money and the responsibility. I don't know man. Today was an early release day, meaning I still haven't had all my classes. Maybe it won't suck as much as it did today. Hopefully. And now I'm constantly thinking about stuff (someone) that I just want to shake out of my head. I can't believe I'm already stressing my self out. W/E I'm going to fill out some job apps and go to bed.
Oh, Jenelia, Karl, and I all gave eachother 'Native American' names.
Goodnight. oh, and good luck tomorrow, Marchanthony. My awesome little football player booger is playing =]
Sunday, August 23, 2009
Let the flames begin.
I'm changing. I can feel it with everyday that goes by, and I like this person I'm becoming.
I looked back on all the bullshit I put myself through last school year and it seems like such a long time ago. I want to be powerful, respected, and seen as an influential women when I get older. But why wait? I can do that now, right? I know what I want, I just didn't know if I was strong enough for the fight. I'm excited for a new year, my junior year. I perceive things differently and as much as we would all like to live stress free, we all need our buttons pushed. We all need that one person that swears to god we will never amount to anything, that one boy who you wasted way too much time on, that friend that will never fully understand what she caused you, the ultimate test. I'm still alive after the constant disapproving glares, insecurity, and finally breaking down. This is about me and how I will continue to make MYSELF proud.
I looked back on all the bullshit I put myself through last school year and it seems like such a long time ago. I want to be powerful, respected, and seen as an influential women when I get older. But why wait? I can do that now, right? I know what I want, I just didn't know if I was strong enough for the fight. I'm excited for a new year, my junior year. I perceive things differently and as much as we would all like to live stress free, we all need our buttons pushed. We all need that one person that swears to god we will never amount to anything, that one boy who you wasted way too much time on, that friend that will never fully understand what she caused you, the ultimate test. I'm still alive after the constant disapproving glares, insecurity, and finally breaking down. This is about me and how I will continue to make MYSELF proud.
Monday, August 17, 2009
Happy birthday to me!
I'm sixteen years old!
Yesterday I had a cookout at my house to celebrate my birthday. I can't even begin to describe to you how I felt. Just try to understand.
I felt out of my body, like I was looking from the outside in. Everything felt so sureal like I was high and didn't have control over anything. I know it sounds a little queer but I'm sure you've experienced something like that. You feel like that moment isn't really happening because you're in such of a good mood that it seems perfect.
I felt the same way today too, even though I had to work. As I was walking home from the bus stop I came to the conclusion that I am simply happy. I don't have a worry in my head and everything seems so clear. I don't know what has gotten over me. I'm not on drugs, though Jenelia thinks I need medication, I'm just feeling really awesome.
I don't know if it has anything to do with it being my birthday but for the past two days I been on cloud 9.
I want to thank everyone for coming to my cookout, I hope you had fun, even though I don't care if you didn't because I did. The gifts I've gotten so far have been more than enough.
Thank you Amy, Gissette, Jose, Lil' Jay, DIANA<333!, and Ericka.
I'm anxious to find out what Jenelia got me, I know it'll be awesome.
I'll post another blog later tonight, my birthday is still not over ;)
Yesterday I had a cookout at my house to celebrate my birthday. I can't even begin to describe to you how I felt. Just try to understand.
I felt out of my body, like I was looking from the outside in. Everything felt so sureal like I was high and didn't have control over anything. I know it sounds a little queer but I'm sure you've experienced something like that. You feel like that moment isn't really happening because you're in such of a good mood that it seems perfect.
I felt the same way today too, even though I had to work. As I was walking home from the bus stop I came to the conclusion that I am simply happy. I don't have a worry in my head and everything seems so clear. I don't know what has gotten over me. I'm not on drugs, though Jenelia thinks I need medication, I'm just feeling really awesome.
I don't know if it has anything to do with it being my birthday but for the past two days I been on cloud 9.
I want to thank everyone for coming to my cookout, I hope you had fun, even though I don't care if you didn't because I did. The gifts I've gotten so far have been more than enough.
Thank you Amy, Gissette, Jose, Lil' Jay, DIANA<333!, and Ericka.
I'm anxious to find out what Jenelia got me, I know it'll be awesome.
I'll post another blog later tonight, my birthday is still not over ;)
Saturday, August 8, 2009
Friday, August 7, 2009
Cht cht ;]
I'm pissed right now. My cousin has this stupid ass away message talking about how she and her "main" is going to get shmacked tomorrow. I'm about to set it off on her little ass.
Has she lost her damned mind? As if I don't have her screen name and can't see her status. I'm going to kill her or maybe take away her sleepover privilidges. Corn.
WHATEVER.
Anyway, moving onto more important things. I went to the Central Landfill and OMG, it was awesome!
I was expecting this huge pile of stinky garbage and I didn't even know it was there 'til the tour guide explained to us that they "bury" the trash.
First, it's starts off with a clay base
Garbage gets dumped
Plastic seal over garbage to keep it airtight
Then a 6 foot layer of compost on top
so on and so forth.
It pretty much looks like a greeeeen, flowery hill.
Pretty cool huh?
After work Brian (beezy) and sebastian came to my house to spend Beezy's last day together. We sat on my porch for most of the time roasting sebastian. Went over to Jenelia's for like 2.3 seconds (stole us some brownies ) back to my house to eat Lo mien and rice :)
Watched some of Slumdog Millionaire and it got late so my brother took them home at around 12ish.
We had fun, Sebastian not so much since my sister was going innnnnn on them asian jokes.
I touched an alligator! A real live 4 ft something aligator. It was crazy.
For science they had Regal Reptiles come in and show us some animals. They had a whole bunch of lizards, geicos, and snakes. There were two snakes, one was a huge python. They had the aligator, her name was Gucci, how cute.
That same day I went around with my science group picking up recyclable trash around the neighborhood. I felt really good after.
Today was pretty decent. Lmaooo my friend MarcAnthony (cool name huh?) said the funniest thing to my boss.
MA: Um Amy? I have a rash
AMY:Okay, Let me see it.
MA: I can't, I don't want to show you.
AMY: Why?
MA: It's under my lemon squeezes.
Lmaooo for the globaly delayed he was talking about his scrotum
ahhh, priceless
Well, I'm planning to go to the beach tomorrow with some of my friends. Jenelia left not too long ago and we couldn't stop laughing.
OH, DIANA! If you are reading this, I miss you.
I know you lost your phone so I haven't been trying to call you. I hope you find it and that you have a safe trip back home and call me as soon as you get here or when you see this :)
Has she lost her damned mind? As if I don't have her screen name and can't see her status. I'm going to kill her or maybe take away her sleepover privilidges. Corn.
WHATEVER.
Anyway, moving onto more important things. I went to the Central Landfill and OMG, it was awesome!
I was expecting this huge pile of stinky garbage and I didn't even know it was there 'til the tour guide explained to us that they "bury" the trash.
First, it's starts off with a clay base
Garbage gets dumped
Plastic seal over garbage to keep it airtight
Then a 6 foot layer of compost on top
so on and so forth.
It pretty much looks like a greeeeen, flowery hill.
Pretty cool huh?
After work Brian (beezy) and sebastian came to my house to spend Beezy's last day together. We sat on my porch for most of the time roasting sebastian. Went over to Jenelia's for like 2.3 seconds (stole us some brownies ) back to my house to eat Lo mien and rice :)
Watched some of Slumdog Millionaire and it got late so my brother took them home at around 12ish.
We had fun, Sebastian not so much since my sister was going innnnnn on them asian jokes.
I touched an alligator! A real live 4 ft something aligator. It was crazy.
For science they had Regal Reptiles come in and show us some animals. They had a whole bunch of lizards, geicos, and snakes. There were two snakes, one was a huge python. They had the aligator, her name was Gucci, how cute.
That same day I went around with my science group picking up recyclable trash around the neighborhood. I felt really good after.
Today was pretty decent. Lmaooo my friend MarcAnthony (cool name huh?) said the funniest thing to my boss.
MA: Um Amy? I have a rash
AMY:Okay, Let me see it.
MA: I can't, I don't want to show you.
AMY: Why?
MA: It's under my lemon squeezes.
Lmaooo for the globaly delayed he was talking about his scrotum
ahhh, priceless
Well, I'm planning to go to the beach tomorrow with some of my friends. Jenelia left not too long ago and we couldn't stop laughing.
OH, DIANA! If you are reading this, I miss you.
I know you lost your phone so I haven't been trying to call you. I hope you find it and that you have a safe trip back home and call me as soon as you get here or when you see this :)
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
Making the world a little greener.
Hellerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr :)
Im stoked.
At my job, we have different clubs the kids can join so every tuesday they're doing an activity with the club that they chose such as, gardening, creativity club, mini-sports, sports, recycling club and games.
I work with the older kids in recycling and tomorrow we are going to the landfill!
I'm super excited.
Especially because I have a great idea for our next project.
Since it is a recycling club we obviously recycle, so they had me call city hall to ask who would be picking up our recycling bins or do we bring it to a specific (I have trouble saying that word) place. I called blah blah got my answer but the man I spoke to asked me for our help.
I was like, huh? He said that I can stop by his office and pick up some brochures and pass them out to south providence residents so people in our neighborhood can be more aware of global warming and recycling. We'll be comming to a neighborhood near you ;)
I felt prettttttttty gooood :)
After work I went with my friends Roger, MarcAnthony, Chris, and my sister to Bambu Tat2 to watch Roger get his millionth Tattoo. It was awesome in there. I met this one guy, I forgot his name, that creates these really awesome wooden action figures.
http://monsterdecay.com/
Check out his website.
I didn't get to watch him get his tatto though. The guy was booked and asked him to come later so Roger took me home. Brotherhoood.
I want to get a tattoo on my left foot, my back, and the anti-eyebrow peircing. My parents will totally disown me.
Now I am home, my feet hurt like crazy, I have to wash my hair , and I'm stoked for tomorrow.
OMGGGGG! You have to watch Shakira's new music video called "she wolf". It is absolutely hillarious.
I look freakishly tall in this picture.
Im stoked.
At my job, we have different clubs the kids can join so every tuesday they're doing an activity with the club that they chose such as, gardening, creativity club, mini-sports, sports, recycling club and games.
I work with the older kids in recycling and tomorrow we are going to the landfill!
I'm super excited.
Especially because I have a great idea for our next project.
Since it is a recycling club we obviously recycle, so they had me call city hall to ask who would be picking up our recycling bins or do we bring it to a specific (I have trouble saying that word) place. I called blah blah got my answer but the man I spoke to asked me for our help.
I was like, huh? He said that I can stop by his office and pick up some brochures and pass them out to south providence residents so people in our neighborhood can be more aware of global warming and recycling. We'll be comming to a neighborhood near you ;)
I felt prettttttttty gooood :)
After work I went with my friends Roger, MarcAnthony, Chris, and my sister to Bambu Tat2 to watch Roger get his millionth Tattoo. It was awesome in there. I met this one guy, I forgot his name, that creates these really awesome wooden action figures.
http://monsterdecay.com/
Check out his website.
I didn't get to watch him get his tatto though. The guy was booked and asked him to come later so Roger took me home. Brotherhoood.
I want to get a tattoo on my left foot, my back, and the anti-eyebrow peircing. My parents will totally disown me.
Now I am home, my feet hurt like crazy, I have to wash my hair , and I'm stoked for tomorrow.
OMGGGGG! You have to watch Shakira's new music video called "she wolf". It is absolutely hillarious.
I look freakishly tall in this picture.
Sunday, August 2, 2009
Life a la Mode.
My internet was disconnected again.
Well, Nothing much has been up lately 'cept for me working as usual and staying home on the weekends. My birthday is in two weeks(aug 17th), kind of excited. I'm apparently having a cookout too. It's crazy. I expect my closetes friends to be there (jenelia, ryan, diana, and solange) and I really would'nt care if no one else showed up, especially my always-talking-shit family.
Beezy and Sebastian left my house not too long ago. Beezy is moving to California on thursday ='[[[, I'm going to miss him a lot. My mom promised to cook him a good-bye dinner on wensday. I missed Sebastian a lot too, but I doubt I'll be seeing him anytime soon.
Roman swung by for a few to say Hi.
My leg hurts real bad. I don't know why, but it is killing me.
I'm sorta tired but I don't want to go to bed now, summer is almost over. I should be out riding my bike somewhere. But instead Im going to watch broke back mountain with my sister because she never knew Heath Ledger starred in that movie. Oh yeaaa.
Let's seeeeee, Oh! I watched DO THE RIGHT THING with Jenelia, omg how awesome was that movie? Seriously, I loved it. I watched Slumdog millionare too, it was awesome as well.
I need to re-do my iPod, I think I want to get a touch so I can play Tap Tap all day. I like that new Mariah Carey song, it's catchy, IDK.
I don't think I have anything negatvie to say. I know, SHOCKING.
Well, I do but it's not much of a burden on me, so I'll keep that one to my self.
I re-arranged my room, lots of space for dancing now. I miss dancing all the time with Jenelia and Diana, sigh.
School is right around the corner guys. I'm excited and a little scared. My junior year I have to be on my grizzy, Lmao. Oh, you know that band/group, w.e called "LMFAO" yea, they suck. It's like techno/pop, they suck. I don't really like Forever the sickest kids either, they kinda suck too.
Im gonna go watch that movie now, so asta mañana ;)
yea I know I didn't spell that right.
Well, Nothing much has been up lately 'cept for me working as usual and staying home on the weekends. My birthday is in two weeks(aug 17th), kind of excited. I'm apparently having a cookout too. It's crazy. I expect my closetes friends to be there (jenelia, ryan, diana, and solange) and I really would'nt care if no one else showed up, especially my always-talking-shit family.
Beezy and Sebastian left my house not too long ago. Beezy is moving to California on thursday ='[[[, I'm going to miss him a lot. My mom promised to cook him a good-bye dinner on wensday. I missed Sebastian a lot too, but I doubt I'll be seeing him anytime soon.
Roman swung by for a few to say Hi.
My leg hurts real bad. I don't know why, but it is killing me.
I'm sorta tired but I don't want to go to bed now, summer is almost over. I should be out riding my bike somewhere. But instead Im going to watch broke back mountain with my sister because she never knew Heath Ledger starred in that movie. Oh yeaaa.
Let's seeeeee, Oh! I watched DO THE RIGHT THING with Jenelia, omg how awesome was that movie? Seriously, I loved it. I watched Slumdog millionare too, it was awesome as well.
I need to re-do my iPod, I think I want to get a touch so I can play Tap Tap all day. I like that new Mariah Carey song, it's catchy, IDK.
I don't think I have anything negatvie to say. I know, SHOCKING.
Well, I do but it's not much of a burden on me, so I'll keep that one to my self.
I re-arranged my room, lots of space for dancing now. I miss dancing all the time with Jenelia and Diana, sigh.
School is right around the corner guys. I'm excited and a little scared. My junior year I have to be on my grizzy, Lmao. Oh, you know that band/group, w.e called "LMFAO" yea, they suck. It's like techno/pop, they suck. I don't really like Forever the sickest kids either, they kinda suck too.
Im gonna go watch that movie now, so asta mañana ;)
yea I know I didn't spell that right.
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
Internet is back on !
I really love my job, it's awesome.
My strongest suit would be having the ability to take control, being creative, enthusiam, and people can depend on me to get the job done.
I'm still having trouble dealing with difficult kids and other co-workers, but I'm on it ;)
Well, I haven't had much time for anything at all. I work from 8:30-5:30/6 every day, five days a week so you can guess I'm always tired.
I owe like a whole summer to Jenelia. I've canceled on her a million times because I always feel like shit, especially on the weekends because all I want to do is sleep and I've left her bored with nothing to do.
Diana on the other hand, I have no clue what she's been up to, which is kind of sad considering Jenelia, Diana, and I were inseperable. Still are. Just not lately.
But I miss them a lot and how things used to be. It's complicated.
My phone broke, finally. I dropped it and now it doesn't slide up all the way and there's some peice sticking out that never did so I'm kind of scared. I love my phone, and I hope I won't have to go back using the regular keyboard.
Ummmmmm what else?
My first paycheck I blew it on shit, I gave my dad forty, bought a couple of stuff, bought my cousin food and a sweater, got jenelia a cute ass gift, and got Brian (beezy) a heroes poster.
I'm getting my next paycheck this friday and I'm saving it 'cept the 75$ that is for drivers ed. I'll save it for back to school supplies and clothes.
I'm going to bed, got to be well rested for tomorrow. And If I'm not feelinf too tired I'll try to make things up to Jenelia and Ryan.
My strongest suit would be having the ability to take control, being creative, enthusiam, and people can depend on me to get the job done.
I'm still having trouble dealing with difficult kids and other co-workers, but I'm on it ;)
Well, I haven't had much time for anything at all. I work from 8:30-5:30/6 every day, five days a week so you can guess I'm always tired.
I owe like a whole summer to Jenelia. I've canceled on her a million times because I always feel like shit, especially on the weekends because all I want to do is sleep and I've left her bored with nothing to do.
Diana on the other hand, I have no clue what she's been up to, which is kind of sad considering Jenelia, Diana, and I were inseperable. Still are. Just not lately.
But I miss them a lot and how things used to be. It's complicated.
My phone broke, finally. I dropped it and now it doesn't slide up all the way and there's some peice sticking out that never did so I'm kind of scared. I love my phone, and I hope I won't have to go back using the regular keyboard.
Ummmmmm what else?
My first paycheck I blew it on shit, I gave my dad forty, bought a couple of stuff, bought my cousin food and a sweater, got jenelia a cute ass gift, and got Brian (beezy) a heroes poster.
I'm getting my next paycheck this friday and I'm saving it 'cept the 75$ that is for drivers ed. I'll save it for back to school supplies and clothes.
I'm going to bed, got to be well rested for tomorrow. And If I'm not feelinf too tired I'll try to make things up to Jenelia and Ryan.
Thursday, July 9, 2009
Rammmm-Buh-Lannnng
I feel horrible right now.
I stayed home from work because of this stomach ache I have.
I feel nausus, hot, and a little dizzy at the moment.
I hope I'll feel better by tomorrow.
Today prettty much sucked. Since school ended I can't find a book worth reading and it sucks.
I got stuck watching television because I couldn't stand being in bed anymore and web surfing just doesn't appeal to me as much as it used to.
I love blogging, it gives me a sense a security and reassurance that I won't lose my damned mind from not opening up because I can spill everything here. But I also hate it because I feel fake.
I say what ever is on my mind but I'm not brave enough to actually go out and act on it.
Well in some cases like the one I am about to write about.
I'm going to pretend like I am talkin to the person that I want to say this to.
Let me make one thing clear sweetie. Don't you ever speak to me as if I am incapable of fulfilling my job.
I know my place and my place is to complete what I have started and that is this job.
I was hired obviously because I have potential, I pick up your slack and you take credit for it, no thank you's or any sign of recognition for my job well done.
You make me feel as if I am imcompetent and unable to reach your level when in reality you depend on me.
I have nothing but respect for you and not because you are older but because I would like to earn your respect just like you have earned mine.
But now you are starting to piss me off because you talk to me as if I was a little kid. Yes, I am much younger then you are but I am much more mature on so many different levels. Your ego is too big for more than one leader and if that is how you want to play then I guess we're going to have to battle this one out because I won't ever live in the shadow of someone else. Especially someone not much greater then me.
AMEN!
Seee, I wish it was that easy.
Oh, this is my current my away:
What is it with guys talking in metaphors? Metaphors that aren't really metaphors because they don't even compare two unlikely objects without using the words "like" or "as". You're a lot more attractive when you don't open your mouth =]
Smh, This was inspired by a very sweet but idiotic male. Just don't try so harddddd.
I stayed home from work because of this stomach ache I have.
I feel nausus, hot, and a little dizzy at the moment.
I hope I'll feel better by tomorrow.
Today prettty much sucked. Since school ended I can't find a book worth reading and it sucks.
I got stuck watching television because I couldn't stand being in bed anymore and web surfing just doesn't appeal to me as much as it used to.
I love blogging, it gives me a sense a security and reassurance that I won't lose my damned mind from not opening up because I can spill everything here. But I also hate it because I feel fake.
I say what ever is on my mind but I'm not brave enough to actually go out and act on it.
Well in some cases like the one I am about to write about.
I'm going to pretend like I am talkin to the person that I want to say this to.
Let me make one thing clear sweetie. Don't you ever speak to me as if I am incapable of fulfilling my job.
I know my place and my place is to complete what I have started and that is this job.
I was hired obviously because I have potential, I pick up your slack and you take credit for it, no thank you's or any sign of recognition for my job well done.
You make me feel as if I am imcompetent and unable to reach your level when in reality you depend on me.
I have nothing but respect for you and not because you are older but because I would like to earn your respect just like you have earned mine.
But now you are starting to piss me off because you talk to me as if I was a little kid. Yes, I am much younger then you are but I am much more mature on so many different levels. Your ego is too big for more than one leader and if that is how you want to play then I guess we're going to have to battle this one out because I won't ever live in the shadow of someone else. Especially someone not much greater then me.
AMEN!
Seee, I wish it was that easy.
Oh, this is my current my away:
What is it with guys talking in metaphors? Metaphors that aren't really metaphors because they don't even compare two unlikely objects without using the words "like" or "as". You're a lot more attractive when you don't open your mouth =]
Smh, This was inspired by a very sweet but idiotic male. Just don't try so harddddd.
Sunday, July 5, 2009
And I Wonderrrrrr, Who's Loving You =']
No one can deny it. Michael Jackson was a musical genius and that is hard to compete with.
Fourth of July was pretty decent. I went to Burlengame Park/Beach W.E w. my family and Didi.
It was fun 'til Diana did the most idiotic thing ever and it became hillarious.
So, w'ere laying on a rock (didi and I) looking up at the clouds when my cousin Danny discovers a dead fish (that he friggin' put in my face -__-). I motioned for him to throw it Diana, if you know Diana you would know that she is scared of everything. (regaurdless of her buffness). He throws the fish at her and like the idiot that she is she jerked (not the dance move) forward so hard that she slid down the rock into a bush of vines and thorns and almost went plummeting into the deep end of the lake. I have never laughed so hard in my life.
She was pretty cut up and while I was busy peeing my self, Danny and everyone else got soooo serious and went to rescue her from the tangle mess of thorns.
Blah blah, I had to clean her cuts and hold her hand the whole time (she's seventeen BTW).
After that we had more fun and finally packed up and went home around 7:30 (aoowwww Lmao)
We went to Pork's "dique cookout", and I never been surrounded by so much immaturity (well one person actually). We left after that and went to Dann'y house, walked to see "fireworks" when we really were going to a party that was shut down and the streets were full of little kids that were still in middle schoool.
Went back to Danny's house then went home and I knocked out.
Friday was the best though. Jenelia called me around 11:00 am to tell me to get ready and head to her house because she made me breakfast. She's the best.
I stayed there a while w. Tika and her then went back home then back to her house and had the best time of my life .
We watched Michael Jackson's Dangerous tour on DVD and had an awesome time w. her and her family.
Here's some pictures :)
Didi and I
This is what I would look like with out any eyebrows
One of Diana's many cuts
yea, i thought this entry was going to be more exciting, I guess not.
good night.
Fourth of July was pretty decent. I went to Burlengame Park/Beach W.E w. my family and Didi.
It was fun 'til Diana did the most idiotic thing ever and it became hillarious.
So, w'ere laying on a rock (didi and I) looking up at the clouds when my cousin Danny discovers a dead fish (that he friggin' put in my face -__-). I motioned for him to throw it Diana, if you know Diana you would know that she is scared of everything. (regaurdless of her buffness). He throws the fish at her and like the idiot that she is she jerked (not the dance move) forward so hard that she slid down the rock into a bush of vines and thorns and almost went plummeting into the deep end of the lake. I have never laughed so hard in my life.
She was pretty cut up and while I was busy peeing my self, Danny and everyone else got soooo serious and went to rescue her from the tangle mess of thorns.
Blah blah, I had to clean her cuts and hold her hand the whole time (she's seventeen BTW).
After that we had more fun and finally packed up and went home around 7:30 (aoowwww Lmao)
We went to Pork's "dique cookout", and I never been surrounded by so much immaturity (well one person actually). We left after that and went to Dann'y house, walked to see "fireworks" when we really were going to a party that was shut down and the streets were full of little kids that were still in middle schoool.
Went back to Danny's house then went home and I knocked out.
Friday was the best though. Jenelia called me around 11:00 am to tell me to get ready and head to her house because she made me breakfast. She's the best.
I stayed there a while w. Tika and her then went back home then back to her house and had the best time of my life .
We watched Michael Jackson's Dangerous tour on DVD and had an awesome time w. her and her family.
Here's some pictures :)
Didi and I
This is what I would look like with out any eyebrows
One of Diana's many cuts
yea, i thought this entry was going to be more exciting, I guess not.
good night.
Monday, June 29, 2009
June 29, 2009!
It was officially my first day at work guys!
I absolutely loved it. I had oodles of fun with the kids and my other staff members.
and I was especially proud when I played some Michael Jackson (Rest In Peace) that my little munchkins were able to sing along to most of the songs =']
I personally didn't know Michael Jackson (if I did it would be the biggest honor) but he has affected so much lives, including mine. Name one person who can honestly say that they didn't grow up listening to MJ or trying to learn his incredible dance moves. EXACTLY! NO ONE.
I feel that so many people had put him on such a high pedistol that it was too hard to believe that he is actually gone. He raised the bar for every artist and there will be no one quite like him, not even Justin Timberlake who btw needs to stop trying so hard. It's not working for you, honey.
Well, other events of this wonderful day.
After work I came home w. my sister and Lil' Harlem (Javier, lmaooo)
He is so awesome<3 That dude right there is the sweetest and funniest kid I've met so far with out the faintest hint of asshole.
Jenelia came over, then Shad, Jordana, and her son Jordan.
Oh god Jordan, He did not waste anytime. As soon as he was put down he walked right up my front steps, into my house, up my stairs and yelled "MINE!"
He's wonderful and super adorable, my little spartan<3
Yea well they all left around 12:30ish and I didn't even notice how late it was. I have to work in the morning, or shall I say in a few hours.
I hope it'll be yet another fantastic day and after work we're all going to watch Year 1 and Transformers 2 =D
Wooooohooo!
I'm super tired and it is 2:09 am, I have to go to bed.
Goodnight/morning for the ass faces that take everything to literal.
I absolutely loved it. I had oodles of fun with the kids and my other staff members.
and I was especially proud when I played some Michael Jackson (Rest In Peace) that my little munchkins were able to sing along to most of the songs =']
I personally didn't know Michael Jackson (if I did it would be the biggest honor) but he has affected so much lives, including mine. Name one person who can honestly say that they didn't grow up listening to MJ or trying to learn his incredible dance moves. EXACTLY! NO ONE.
I feel that so many people had put him on such a high pedistol that it was too hard to believe that he is actually gone. He raised the bar for every artist and there will be no one quite like him, not even Justin Timberlake who btw needs to stop trying so hard. It's not working for you, honey.
Well, other events of this wonderful day.
After work I came home w. my sister and Lil' Harlem (Javier, lmaooo)
He is so awesome<3 That dude right there is the sweetest and funniest kid I've met so far with out the faintest hint of asshole.
Jenelia came over, then Shad, Jordana, and her son Jordan.
Oh god Jordan, He did not waste anytime. As soon as he was put down he walked right up my front steps, into my house, up my stairs and yelled "MINE!"
He's wonderful and super adorable, my little spartan<3
Yea well they all left around 12:30ish and I didn't even notice how late it was. I have to work in the morning, or shall I say in a few hours.
I hope it'll be yet another fantastic day and after work we're all going to watch Year 1 and Transformers 2 =D
Wooooohooo!
I'm super tired and it is 2:09 am, I have to go to bed.
Goodnight/morning for the ass faces that take everything to literal.
Sunday, June 28, 2009
I so forgot I had this in my photobucket.
Yes, that is my forearm and it has "Hop off my wave" written on it.
My very talented brother generously took much time and effort to tattoo this fantastic piece of art on my virgin body. I wanted a couple of waves in the background tho, maybe some dollar bills but he had places to go and not enough color ink.
Lmaooooooooooooo, god that was like the best prank ever.
I actually convinced Jenelia into thinking that I would even let my brother come near me with a needle.
and get this, she wanted to know if he can do hers!
she didn't know what it said though, but it was hillarious. The excitement in her little squeaky voice was priceless =']
ILH x3
I will survive.
I never ask for much
helping someone when they are in need of a friend never comes with a cost on my part
I don't need to have my ass kissed for what I do, but I don't take too kindly when I am taken for granted
and yet I continue to put all my effort into your life and problems that I forget about myself
You know I sacrifice plenty to be there for you but as much as you say sorry, you still fail to show some sort of appreciation
All I ask is for you to be true to me and to yourself
Is that too much to ask for? Is that such big of a request that you do the opposite purposely to almost show me that you refuse to cooperate?
So much has come out that it is almost too big of a pill to swallow
even for me and I get over things quickly and easily.
I guess I expected too much, but you would think that it is only common sense not to treat the only person that has ever accepted you, that you never had to pretend with, like dirt.
I guess I'm the only one that got the memo.
Well, I'm dealing.
and I deserve more credit then I am given, but then again it isn't about who is the better friend
I just want the favor to be returned I guess.......
God, it sounds like I'm going to cut myself after this
Don't take my venting as a weakness, I'll live. Trust me. I can't imagine how this situation can hold me back from success. Never underestimate me, KAY :)
And try not to guess who I am talking about because I am not referring to only one particular person.
helping someone when they are in need of a friend never comes with a cost on my part
I don't need to have my ass kissed for what I do, but I don't take too kindly when I am taken for granted
and yet I continue to put all my effort into your life and problems that I forget about myself
You know I sacrifice plenty to be there for you but as much as you say sorry, you still fail to show some sort of appreciation
All I ask is for you to be true to me and to yourself
Is that too much to ask for? Is that such big of a request that you do the opposite purposely to almost show me that you refuse to cooperate?
So much has come out that it is almost too big of a pill to swallow
even for me and I get over things quickly and easily.
I guess I expected too much, but you would think that it is only common sense not to treat the only person that has ever accepted you, that you never had to pretend with, like dirt.
I guess I'm the only one that got the memo.
Well, I'm dealing.
and I deserve more credit then I am given, but then again it isn't about who is the better friend
I just want the favor to be returned I guess.......
God, it sounds like I'm going to cut myself after this
Don't take my venting as a weakness, I'll live. Trust me. I can't imagine how this situation can hold me back from success. Never underestimate me, KAY :)
And try not to guess who I am talking about because I am not referring to only one particular person.
Monday, June 22, 2009
FOR SPARTA
='DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
I just came home from the Met's graduation with solange and it was pretty overwhelming.
I try not to think about things too much but OMG, Im turning sixteen, I am going to be graduating soon and its all too much for me.
I guess I'm scared that I wont be able to deal with the pressure of being on my own and not knowing if I have what it takes to make it.
Sigh, I just have to concentrate on my junior and senior year which im a little excited for.
Im going to be more independent and I have so much that i want to do.
With all my doubts, Gianelle is going places in life, Trust me.
anyway, today was pretty good. Roman picked me up from my casa and we arrived to an almost empty school. I finished my portfolio reflection and helped my teacher organize her class room.
Then Roman and I picked up Sebastian and Pork and we went back to school to hand in our clearance sheets.
I went to an orientation at my job today, YES I HAVE A JOB!
I am a SR Counselor at a summer camp and i am super excited.
I have worked there before as a jr counselor and a volunteer but i never got paid weekly
To most ppl 100$ a week isnt much for the kind of job and responsibility i have but im lucky that im gettin paid, and anyway 100$ can go farrrrrrrrrrrr, plus im going to have a blast :)
Oh, lmaooo My teacher made me save my blog under her favorites because she wanted to read it, idk why but i did so w.e
And i ended this yr with a bang!
I didnt do so great the first three quarters, but 4th quarter i was not joking around anymore.
i was tried of having my inteligence underestimated
and im a beast lmaoo :)
The movie 300 is awesome.
I just came home from the Met's graduation with solange and it was pretty overwhelming.
I try not to think about things too much but OMG, Im turning sixteen, I am going to be graduating soon and its all too much for me.
I guess I'm scared that I wont be able to deal with the pressure of being on my own and not knowing if I have what it takes to make it.
Sigh, I just have to concentrate on my junior and senior year which im a little excited for.
Im going to be more independent and I have so much that i want to do.
With all my doubts, Gianelle is going places in life, Trust me.
anyway, today was pretty good. Roman picked me up from my casa and we arrived to an almost empty school. I finished my portfolio reflection and helped my teacher organize her class room.
Then Roman and I picked up Sebastian and Pork and we went back to school to hand in our clearance sheets.
I went to an orientation at my job today, YES I HAVE A JOB!
I am a SR Counselor at a summer camp and i am super excited.
I have worked there before as a jr counselor and a volunteer but i never got paid weekly
To most ppl 100$ a week isnt much for the kind of job and responsibility i have but im lucky that im gettin paid, and anyway 100$ can go farrrrrrrrrrrr, plus im going to have a blast :)
Oh, lmaooo My teacher made me save my blog under her favorites because she wanted to read it, idk why but i did so w.e
And i ended this yr with a bang!
I didnt do so great the first three quarters, but 4th quarter i was not joking around anymore.
i was tried of having my inteligence underestimated
and im a beast lmaoo :)
The movie 300 is awesome.
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Monday, June 1, 2009
TEAM FREAKING JACOB^^!
http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.channel&channelID=171184815&searchid=6a9d8908-1c28-47b9-9736-af65d7561626
its just so...................................Amazing =']
its just so...................................Amazing =']
Thursday, May 28, 2009
..................................
how can you possibly sleep at night knowing that you're just a big fake.
making yourself seem like your this all around jolly person that genuinely cares.
stop pretending you're so perfect, other ppl cant see or at least they pretend they dont bc they want to believe that "Im always happy, come share your secrets w/ me and i'll act like i care and nod my head occasionally so you'll think im still listening" act. Well it doesnt fool me, at least not anymore.
once again im finding myself angry at nothing, on the verge of tears for no reason. only there is a reason, but apparently not important enough for you to keep your word.
Im supposed to be writing a poem about what i think is the purpose of life. i would say its love, being accepted for who you are and finding happiness in a circle of ppl that share the same amount of concern for one another as you do. how can i go through with writing a poem when i dont even have that, i hope to. But then again, no one ever really cares as much as i do. about anything.
and once again im rambling about nothing in particular, just my emo ass thinks too much.
making yourself seem like your this all around jolly person that genuinely cares.
stop pretending you're so perfect, other ppl cant see or at least they pretend they dont bc they want to believe that "Im always happy, come share your secrets w/ me and i'll act like i care and nod my head occasionally so you'll think im still listening" act. Well it doesnt fool me, at least not anymore.
once again im finding myself angry at nothing, on the verge of tears for no reason. only there is a reason, but apparently not important enough for you to keep your word.
Im supposed to be writing a poem about what i think is the purpose of life. i would say its love, being accepted for who you are and finding happiness in a circle of ppl that share the same amount of concern for one another as you do. how can i go through with writing a poem when i dont even have that, i hope to. But then again, no one ever really cares as much as i do. about anything.
and once again im rambling about nothing in particular, just my emo ass thinks too much.
Sunday, May 24, 2009
=D
Yesterday I had the best time of my life, i mean wow :)
My little sister was part of a sweet fifteen so ofcourse i went to support her and my friends did too.
she looked awesome, absolutely beautiful in her dress, heels, and makeup. My baby sister looked like a woman. =']
well, her dance partner was my awesome cousin Eddy and they did perfect. never missed a beat. on point and just plain awesome =]
i had so much fun, i danced my ass off. Im so glad i got to share that night w. my closest friends and family, it was...........Awesome lmaooo
we all looked lovely
I loved it.
and of course like every blog i write theres always a not-so-happy ending.
i know i disappointed you
Im sorry, i truely am and i hope you dont think im not taking this seriously bc i am.
Im sorry, Mom.
My little sister was part of a sweet fifteen so ofcourse i went to support her and my friends did too.
she looked awesome, absolutely beautiful in her dress, heels, and makeup. My baby sister looked like a woman. =']
well, her dance partner was my awesome cousin Eddy and they did perfect. never missed a beat. on point and just plain awesome =]
i had so much fun, i danced my ass off. Im so glad i got to share that night w. my closest friends and family, it was...........Awesome lmaooo
we all looked lovely
I loved it.
and of course like every blog i write theres always a not-so-happy ending.
i know i disappointed you
Im sorry, i truely am and i hope you dont think im not taking this seriously bc i am.
Im sorry, Mom.
Thursday, May 14, 2009
worst day of my life.
What am i supposed to do?
how can i possibly forgive someone whos hurt me so bad if they cant see why it had such a great affect on me.
not only did i get screwed over bad but my feelings were totally blown off
oh and to make things better, i got suspended.=D big poppa bucks had to come into school today and i almost got the shit beaten outta me rite in front of my prinicipal. HOW EXCITING
-__________-
idk if sorry is even enough, if i can trust again the only person i ever opened up. and i see now that it was a mistake but i dont want it to be. becuase having my feelings gaurded all the time drains so much engergy from me. and what can i say, i tried.
i tried to be as confident as everyone thinks i am. and i once when i was feeling my self, i was really doing things for myself, everything i thought i was over gets thrown rite in my face all at once.
Sorry.......
Im sorry.......
yea i feel you......
My bad......
that will never happen again.....
idk if that means anything to me anymore.
=T,whats done is done. i cant do anything about it but move on. like always.....
anyway, syediah, linda, esvin, maria, and Kenny did so well performing their poems.
they made me so proud, LEADERSHIP^^^^
lmaoo.
syediah so made me cry and linda, you are awesomeeeee<3
well since i got in trouble at school, i have to go to bed extra early and i have to be driven to school becuase i am no longer trusted with getting to school on time by my self.
this weekend better be awesome.
how can i possibly forgive someone whos hurt me so bad if they cant see why it had such a great affect on me.
not only did i get screwed over bad but my feelings were totally blown off
oh and to make things better, i got suspended.=D big poppa bucks had to come into school today and i almost got the shit beaten outta me rite in front of my prinicipal. HOW EXCITING
-__________-
idk if sorry is even enough, if i can trust again the only person i ever opened up. and i see now that it was a mistake but i dont want it to be. becuase having my feelings gaurded all the time drains so much engergy from me. and what can i say, i tried.
i tried to be as confident as everyone thinks i am. and i once when i was feeling my self, i was really doing things for myself, everything i thought i was over gets thrown rite in my face all at once.
Sorry.......
Im sorry.......
yea i feel you......
My bad......
that will never happen again.....
idk if that means anything to me anymore.
=T,whats done is done. i cant do anything about it but move on. like always.....
anyway, syediah, linda, esvin, maria, and Kenny did so well performing their poems.
they made me so proud, LEADERSHIP^^^^
lmaoo.
syediah so made me cry and linda, you are awesomeeeee<3
well since i got in trouble at school, i have to go to bed extra early and i have to be driven to school becuase i am no longer trusted with getting to school on time by my self.
this weekend better be awesome.
Thursday, May 7, 2009
Sigh.....
Idk wether i should be relieved or totally hurt.
i mean i liked you alot, and i cant blame you for moving on.
i've been so hurt in the past that it stopped me from letting myself open up to you.
and now you seem happy, happier then you've ever been w. any girl.
but ur one of my bestfriends so i guess i should be thankful that you're happy and that she makes you happy.
everything seems good between us, i just hope nothing gets in the way.................... AGAIN
anyway, Im doing really good in school this quarter and i found that its not as hard as i made it out to be. My teacher Ms almagno "maggie" got me into spoken word, poetry slam w.e u wanna call it.
i love it, its awesome and im really into and i think im going to continue writing poems like i used to so and maybe even perform some :)
I also want to say that im so very thankful for what i have, and up until today i never knew how good i have it.
i felt like absolute shit today for contemplating on such small things when i have friends whos sibling are getting shot and friends who harm themselves because they see no purpose in living any longer.
i just want to say that im thankful, and talking to a specific person, I'm sorry, i love you, and i never realized how much u mean to me. You are truley one of my bestfriends and i cant see my self in life w. out you.
i mean i liked you alot, and i cant blame you for moving on.
i've been so hurt in the past that it stopped me from letting myself open up to you.
and now you seem happy, happier then you've ever been w. any girl.
but ur one of my bestfriends so i guess i should be thankful that you're happy and that she makes you happy.
everything seems good between us, i just hope nothing gets in the way.................... AGAIN
anyway, Im doing really good in school this quarter and i found that its not as hard as i made it out to be. My teacher Ms almagno "maggie" got me into spoken word, poetry slam w.e u wanna call it.
i love it, its awesome and im really into and i think im going to continue writing poems like i used to so and maybe even perform some :)
I also want to say that im so very thankful for what i have, and up until today i never knew how good i have it.
i felt like absolute shit today for contemplating on such small things when i have friends whos sibling are getting shot and friends who harm themselves because they see no purpose in living any longer.
i just want to say that im thankful, and talking to a specific person, I'm sorry, i love you, and i never realized how much u mean to me. You are truley one of my bestfriends and i cant see my self in life w. out you.
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
shall i compare thee to a summers day?
Man today was soo AWESOME. I like had the best experience of my life so far. Okay so it Poetry month in case you didnt know. My school (hope high) is like really connected to brown university. So some of the brown students that has been teaching the writing classes abouot poetry welcomed the hope students to come to a poetry slam at brown called "HOLY SHIT!". its was about ppls beliefs, religions, lack of spirtuality and all that stuff. so the poems were about why they believe in what they believe in and why they dont have any faith. it was awesome. it made me really look at life in a whole other perspective. some ppl sang. one asain guy sang a song he wrote called Indiana and played the piana. Oh it was absolutely beautiful. Well, we were in some conference room and beneath us a band was playin. they were like really heavy metal/screamo type band which is awesome ^___6, so i checked it out and omg like i have never been to excited and relaxed and totally into something i swear. me and the other students from my school walked back up thayer st w. one of my teachers. now theis teacher is the definition of a pain in the ass. i really disliked her. but i got to know her better and she is a great teacher. sure she nags us and can be really annoying but she honestly wants all her kids to succeed and i appreciate that. well its getting late and my sister needs my help on some shakespeare essay and i gotta wake up early cuz i so came late to school. so bye and poetry is awesome. i think im going to start writing again =DDDDD
Saturday, February 7, 2009
Providence we go hard.
H H H Hello :)
Sigh, providence is so small.
How Jenelia and I were taking the bus to Kp and some kids w. really ugly fannel shirts asked us if there were any parties. You wanna know Jenelia response?
J: GAIN GREEEENE!
UFSB(ugly fannel shirt boy): Where?
J: Idk =D
Lmaoo and then they got off the bus and we were laughin so hard. so then we took the 11 where we seen natalie and my friend Alexi and how we were almost down broad st when the same UFSB came on the bus again.
Then i yelled "GAIN GREEENEEE!!" Lmfoaoo =D Ahhhhh Man.
Well this is how everything started. we had planned to chill w. one of our friends Jeison before he went back on his boat to D.R. he lives soo far -________-
we went to the mall first and seen mookie and Roro who apparently doesnt like ppl who dont comment his pictures on myspace(Im one of those ppl) Lmfaoo.
we seen solange at subway where she works. she looks sooo sexxay covered in salami slices and mayo Lol
omg, and then there this hot asian boy who jenelia is goin to winter ball with. yea he was there and his hair is awesome<3 and hes hot____^
W.e so we left the mall and took the bus to jeison's house and shad and some other kid was there. they were recording so yea i was just there. Lmaoo.
Jeison dead put on some Believe-Cher Omg lets fucking go.
Oh and we seen Tika<3 shes my most adorable tiny friend w. the nicest boobs so we went to her cousin alex's house that was across the street and omggg u wont believe what i saw.
i walk into the room and then there he is. some really hot white boy<3 w. Loafer shoes and the ripped skinnies and all/
his name was nick and he plays a guitar in a band called annibel. oh and hes badd. really bad lmaoo.
(im givin this nigga madd head.)
well we left and took the bus. then went to my cousins house and grubbed.
we met up w. rakia and solange in search for something to do.
we went to crowns and ran into white boy josh and jeroc then they took us home and now im here listenin to usher-confessions. idk why i hate this corny song and its on my sisters Ipod.
Feb vaca is in a weeek =DDDDDD
Ight well im splash my way out this piece, dueces home slices lmaooo
Sigh, providence is so small.
How Jenelia and I were taking the bus to Kp and some kids w. really ugly fannel shirts asked us if there were any parties. You wanna know Jenelia response?
J: GAIN GREEEENE!
UFSB(ugly fannel shirt boy): Where?
J: Idk =D
Lmaoo and then they got off the bus and we were laughin so hard. so then we took the 11 where we seen natalie and my friend Alexi and how we were almost down broad st when the same UFSB came on the bus again.
Then i yelled "GAIN GREEENEEE!!" Lmfoaoo =D Ahhhhh Man.
Well this is how everything started. we had planned to chill w. one of our friends Jeison before he went back on his boat to D.R. he lives soo far -________-
we went to the mall first and seen mookie and Roro who apparently doesnt like ppl who dont comment his pictures on myspace(Im one of those ppl) Lmfaoo.
we seen solange at subway where she works. she looks sooo sexxay covered in salami slices and mayo Lol
omg, and then there this hot asian boy who jenelia is goin to winter ball with. yea he was there and his hair is awesome<3 and hes hot____^
W.e so we left the mall and took the bus to jeison's house and shad and some other kid was there. they were recording so yea i was just there. Lmaoo.
Jeison dead put on some Believe-Cher Omg lets fucking go.
Oh and we seen Tika<3 shes my most adorable tiny friend w. the nicest boobs so we went to her cousin alex's house that was across the street and omggg u wont believe what i saw.
i walk into the room and then there he is. some really hot white boy<3 w. Loafer shoes and the ripped skinnies and all/
his name was nick and he plays a guitar in a band called annibel. oh and hes badd. really bad lmaoo.
(im givin this nigga madd head.)
well we left and took the bus. then went to my cousins house and grubbed.
we met up w. rakia and solange in search for something to do.
we went to crowns and ran into white boy josh and jeroc then they took us home and now im here listenin to usher-confessions. idk why i hate this corny song and its on my sisters Ipod.
Feb vaca is in a weeek =DDDDDD
Ight well im splash my way out this piece, dueces home slices lmaooo
Thursday, January 29, 2009
No name
Her pain falls in slow steps into her pale palms
filling in the banks of her very own creases
her pain flows sorrowfully, almost a beautiful sight
caused by overwhelming feelings of fustration and anger
her pain grows rapidly
running at warp speed
letting out a mournful siren, distrubing the silenced aches of those around her
her pain reaches an edge, cascading over those deceased
fertilizing thier place of peace with her pity
her pain
her pain lies with him six feet under
-okay so maybe this poem kinda sucks lmao
filling in the banks of her very own creases
her pain flows sorrowfully, almost a beautiful sight
caused by overwhelming feelings of fustration and anger
her pain grows rapidly
running at warp speed
letting out a mournful siren, distrubing the silenced aches of those around her
her pain reaches an edge, cascading over those deceased
fertilizing thier place of peace with her pity
her pain
her pain lies with him six feet under
-okay so maybe this poem kinda sucks lmao
Monday, January 26, 2009
Hi,
Okay so im new to this blogging thing. My friend Jenelia tells me its "Fun" so im here, fun blogging.
where should I start. Well first off lemme tell u that i have nothing really interesting going on in my life, currently. just the same 'ole everyday bull.
For an instance, you think you know somebody and when you least expect it they change on you, just like that. its funny how u would go out of ur way for someone and they sit there and feed u the same bull shit only u really meant it. i have a few friends and im not doubting their friendship or nothing its just that all my life i always had that one person to screw me over. i dont tell anyone my business and if i do its minor. if u can get something major out of me than u deserve an award. i dont like expressing how i feel for the simple fact that its hard for me to fully open up and that i never feel that whats on my mind would really matter to someone.
Wow. this is kinda weird, i would never picture my self blogging.
Its kinda cool ^____^
This isnt the last of me =D
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